It's All About Coco

It's All About Coco
The Love Of Our Life

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

The Daddy Vortex

OK, so it's been a little over a month now and Daddyhood couldn't be better. I (Victor) really think this is what I was born to be, a Dad. It feels completely natural and organic (I know that word is overused but somehow it seems appropriate) and is the most fulfilling "job" I've ever had (after my last full-time job experience that doesn't seem like such a high hurdle but you know what I mean!).

Now, I'm still a husband, friend, son, brother, etc. but am noticing that it can be hard to balance all those roles. The days seem to fly by and they are basically centered around when Coco will eat or sleep next, what she needs and what things I need to get done in the down time I have. Pretty much everything else has taken a back seat to caring for Coco and meeting her needs. (Before the advice starts rolling in, let me say that I realize that this is a natural part of adjusting to being a parent and I am not worried, simply letting you know where I am TODAY.) Fortunately, I have a great husband who encourages and reminds me to take time out of the day for me (and us) but it's so hard to do. I feel really guilty leaving Coco for any length of time even though we have a wonderful and very capable baby nurse on hand.

I WAS a BIG email and phone person but not anymore! It seems to take me days to reply to emails and phone calls, forget it, they're virtually impossible for me to attend to. So, if you've left me a voice mail or written me an email and I haven't gotten back to you yet, I'm sorry!

This is what I call the "Daddy Vortex" (DV)'s a space occupied by stay-at-home Dads (and Moms!) that is filled with all things baby and not much else. The DV is kind of a cool's very cozy, no one cares about what you're wearing or how your hair looks and you can sing all the silly songs you like and make all the funny faces you've ever wanted to and not get any strange looks. It's filled with excitement about poopy diapers, loud belches and other bodily functions that in other environments would NOT be topics of discussion or amusement. The DV is filled with love, laughter and lots of amusing sometimes senseless chatter aimed at amusing a very easy audience!

I'm getting accustomed to life in the DV while trying to maintain the proper balance with the world outside the DV. It can be an odd balancing act BUT I'm making my way and remembering (most of the time) to just soak up every minute, every second of this experience because it will only happen once with Coco.

Until later....


  1. Beautifully written and so poignant... Victor, Coco is a very lucky child to have a dad like you!There are many children (and I was one of them) that will never feel one moment of the love you show for your daughter...